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APHORISMS, QUOTATIONS, AND WISECRACKS

Visit the categories below for witty, entertaining, and sometimes even wise remarks. However, don't repeat them--remember, as Aristotle (384--322 B.C.) advises, "It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims." Just read and enjoy them--unless, of course, you're not young and/or not a man!

  1. ABSENCE, ADVICE--GOOD & OTHERWISE, AFRICA, AGING, AMERICA--LOVE IT, LEAVE IT, OR LEAVE IT ALONE, ANCESTRY--OR LACK OF IT, ANIMALS (including cats and dogs), ART, ASTROLOGY, & AUSTRALIA. Updated 2/22/07.

  2. BALDNESS, BOREDOM, & BRAVERY. Updated 8/01/2000.

  3. CANADA, CENSORSHIP, CHANCE, CHILD-BIRTH, CHILD-REARING, CHILDREN. Updated 8/27/04.

  4. CHINA, CITIES, COMEDY/HUMOR, COMMITTEE, COMMON COLD, COMPLAINTS, COMPUTERS, CONSCIENCE, CONSISTENCY, CRITICISM, CURSING. Updated 7/01/03.

  5. DANCE, DEATH, Burial, Immortality, DEATH PENALTY, DECISIONS, DENTOPEDALOGY, DIVORCE, DRINKING, DRIVING, DRUGS. Updated 4/29/05.

  6. EDUCATION AND EDUCATORS, ENGLAND, ENVIRONMENT, ETHNIC COMPARISONS, EXERCISE, EXPERIENCE. Updated 4/29/05.

  7. FACTS AND FIGURES, FASHION, FATHERS, FLYING, FOOD, FRANCE, FRIENDS, THE FUTURE. Updated 2/4/05.

  8. GENTLEMEN AND LADIES, GHOSTS, GREAT MEN ON THEMSELVES, GREAT TEACHERS. Updated 2/12/07.

  9. HEALTH, HISTORY, HONESTY, HOUSEWORK, HUMILITY, HUMANITY, HURRY. Updated 7/01/03.

  10. INACCURACY, INFLATION, INTELLIGENCE & THE LACK THEREOF, IRISH, JOURNALISM, JUSTICE, KINDNESS. Updated 7/01/03.

  11. LAUGHTER, LAW, LAZINESS, LIFE, LITERATURE, LOSING, LOVE, LUCK. Updated 8/27/04.

  12. MARRIAGE, MEDICINE, MEMORY, MEN, MENTAL ILLNESS, MISTAKES, MODERATION, MONEY, MOTHERS, MUSIC. Updated 4/26/07.

  13. NATURE, NEATNESS COUNTS, OBSERVATIONS, OPINIONS, OPTIMISM & PESSIMISM, POLITICS, POVERTY, PROBLEM-SOLVING, PROCRASTINATION, PROVERBS, PUNCTUALITY. Updated 4/25/07.

  14. QUARRELS, READING, RELIGION, SEX (in many forms), SMOKING Updated 4/26/07.

  15. TAXATION, THINK!, TRAVEL, TROUBLE, UNIVERSE (BIGGEST MYSTERIES OF), WAR & PEACE, WEATHER, WOMEN, WORK, WRITING . Updated 4/25/2007.

  16. Choice quotations from the infamous A. NONYMOUS, in categories such as "Computers" and "Drinking" and "Exercise." Updated 4/26/07.

  17. BUMPER STICKERS of note, also composed by A. Nonymous, all car-related. Last updated on 9/13/02.

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Discerning fans of these quotes will also enjoy MS. NITPICKER'S GUIDE TO WRITING ALMOST-READABLE FAN FICTION, which is both amusing and educational, even for those unfortunate souls who've never heard of fan fiction.

Have you found, to your horror, that you share my taste for bawdy, sarcastic, silly, or occasionally serious things? Delve into my collection of poetry by folks like Housman, Graham, Herford, and Adams.

Visit my home page, if you'd like.

Copyright 1999 - 2013, Jane A. Leavell. All rights reserved.